Overthinking, together.

Who we are, why we’re here, and what this space is really for.

We’re Toby & Mikey. You might already know us from Instagram, or YouTube, or maybe this is your first time meeting us. Either way, welcome.

We’re husbands. I’m Toby (I’m 29), and Mikey’s a few months younger, soon to join me in the final year of our twenties. We spend a lot of our time renovating our home, walking our dogs, watching films, reading, cooking and trying to live a little more intentionally each day. We overthink everything, talk too much about life, our lives, why we’re here, and what it all really means.

We’ve shared our lives online for a few years now. It started with just me, documenting life from our small cottage in a village between Bristol (our hometown) and Bath. And now, exactly one year to the day before writing this first post, we sold that home and moved to London. First into a temporary rental apartment, always intended as a stepping stone, and now into a small mews house we’re slowly turning into our home. It’s very different, but we already love it very much.

This Substack is here to be a little slower than social media, and hopefully, a little more raw for you too. A bit more personal, less about what’s ‘trending’ (though we do our best to avoid that already, tricky as it is), and more about what’s true.
A space for our thoughts, stories, tips, the things we’ve learned, and the things we’re still figuring out.

We’re planning to share the ins and outs of our renovation, our relationship, our mental health journeys, and everything else that comes with trying to build a life together as a young-ish gay couple, in an increasingly complicated world.

There’ll be posts and update videos about homemaking and renovations, but also identity, queerness, creativity, mental health, relationships, and all the little things that we over-think that can’t quite make it into a 60-second video.

Sometimes it’ll be reflective, sometimes practical. And sometimes just a thought that won’t leave us alone until we talk through it (over and over and over).

And truthfully, more than anything, this is something I need to do. I’ve been in a bit of a lost headspace recently. Actually on and off for a couple of years. Struggling with depression, a recent ADHD diagnosis, and trying my best to remain positive. I’ve been struggling to channel my creativity. And struggling to feel passionate about anything. But because writing and storytelling have always been how I make sense of the world, I think this might help me find my way back to something meaningful to me.

I’m looking forward to seeing where it goes.
*Correction, we’re looking forward to seeing where it goes.

Thank you for being here, we appreciate you,
Toby & Mikey

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